Adulting Interferes with Ballet
Adulting: noun; the act of performing duties required of oneself after one turns of legal age, i.e. working to make money, shopping, car upkeep, medical appointments, etc.
Adulting sucks. I get that certain things need to get done, and that they take up time. That’s fine! I’m okay with that! But what I am really having a problem with? All the mental stress and tiredness that comes with it.
Now, don’t get the wrong idea; this is not a blog post meant to complain about normal, routine things that everyone does. I’m not even complaining about having to work and stress about my job outside my company, because I feel very fortunate to have it, and the more I work, the less stress I cause for my wonderful mother.
No, this is just to put out on the internet something I’ve come to realize: Adulting Interferes with Ballet.
Adulting interferes with my ideal life of immersion in ballet. Think about it: sure, my time is taken up by things I need to do, important things, outside of dancing. Again, I am completely fine with this healthy, normal idea. Here comes the important But: at company, my thoughts and energies should be focused completely on rehearsing and becoming a better dancer. Instead, I find myself unable to ignore all thoughts and worries about financial crap and what I need to do outside the wonderful studio time I enjoy.
I’m sure I’m not the first person to reach this conclusion. There are so many other dancers out there who have “real life”, adulting crap to attend to as well, and this goes for anyone at any job. Ballet takes so much focus and discipline, and I can’t help but think back to my time dancing in high school. I focused more on thinking about my rehearsals and my technique and improving than my schoolwork! (I’m not endorsing this mindset, but school came pretty easy for me, so I was able to do it). It was a lovely time where I was able to grow and improve a lot.
This is not to say I cannot grow and improve in my current situation, or that I am alone in it. In fact, I count myself lucky for all the support my family gives me. I also would like to tip my hat and acknowledge all the dancers and non-dancers before me who have had to work multiple jobs and undergo the stresses of everyday life to pursue their dreams.
I guess what I’m saying is, it’ll be nice when I am able to be paid for what I love to do, and be able to pour myself into it completely. And I’m told by someone on the other side that it does in fact get easier after the inaguration year of adulting and living on your own. So to end this post, hats thrown in the air to celebrate the act of pursuing your dreams, in spite of adulting, and in the hopes that soon a greater percentage of our energies can be flung in our favorite directions!
~Your reluctantly adulting, Friendly Neighborhood Ballerina-to-Be